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Animator Chuck Jones Dies in Tragic Anvil Accident

ALBUQUERQUE, NM--Animator Chuck Jones, who helped turn Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, and the Grinch into cartoon legends, passed away on February 23rd at age 89. Jones was reportedly thrown off a cliff, struck on the head by a piano, an anvil, and wooden mallet, then blown to smithereenies by several sticks of Acme brand dynamite. Though normally such events would produce fatal results, it ... Read more

National IFC Convention Demands More Respect, Tits

National Interfraternity Council President Trent Johnson is worried about the stereotypes that most people associate with fraternities and the Greek system in general. This week, in an address to fellow IFC members at the inaugural National Interfraternity Council, Johnson cautioned that fraternities face the stigma of being lazy, Abercrombie and amp, Fitch wearing, alcohol obsessed party frea ... Read more

Co-Workers Wish Guy Whose Family Died in a Horrible Accident Would Stop Swearing on the Souls of His Dead Family

Workers at the Bill Truman Seal Fastener Company filed a grievance with human resources manager Ted Scofi eld in the hopes of stopping Truman employee and recent widower Tony Kuzwan from constantly swearing to do things on the departed souls of his family.

"I guess it wasn't so bad at fi rst," said fellow employee and 5 year certifi ed machinist Jessica Lind. "I mean, his fa ... Read more