Law Student Leaves for Pro Ranks Early
Competitive classmates gave a collective sigh of relief last Monday when Michael "The Brief" Rubinwicz declared that he would forgo his final year of law school at the University of Michigan to enter the workforce this fall.
During a press conference held Monday outside his favorite cubicle at the Shapiro Graduate Library, Rubinwicz, a second-year law student, made his announcement. "I've accomplished everything I could here and frankly, I just want to practice at the highest level," said the neatly-dressed multi-term Angell Scholar. "I've enjoyed my time here, but I feel I should be competing with the Cochrans and Shapiros of the world. I'm ready."
Rubinwicz is the latest in a long line of students lost to early professional law entry. The most notable among them is Robert Burnette, who just one year ago left the high school debate team his father coached to join the National Bar Association.
Burnette said that he offered advice to Rubinwicz about his decision. "The adjustments, especially some of the life-style aspects, were difficult at first. I mean, the guys at my firm all had wives, lovers, and hot secretaries. As a young kid my only experience in that area came from fooling around with some of the dirty chicks at the community college back home. I'll admit I was scared at first but I adjusted. I bought an expensive foreign-made automobile, hired a gorgeous paralegal and now I'm a great lawyer."
Burnette, who became Delaware's youngest ever district attorney, continued, "Early on, I had trouble executing, but now I'm a dominant force in the NBA."
Just last month he convicted a 67-year-old woman despite her obvious innocence and adamant supporters. "A case like that is extremely difficult," said Burnette, "Especially in a crowded room filled with angry grandchildren and rabid church officials. But I put the bitch on ice and I'm confident Rubinwicz will be doing the same twelve months from now."
The defection of Rubinwicz has some educators fearing that this is part of a growing trend. They say the focus is being removed from actual learning and America's universities are fast becoming mere minor league systems, stepping stones for those enrolled to pursue secure, high paying jobs.
But, as Prof. Steven P. Croley explains, it's hard to blame the students. "The legal field has traditionally been a means of escape for those brought up in largely upper-middle-class suburban neighborhoods. When these kids finally have the opportunity to "get out", It's not surprising they do. Students dream of buying their parents houses in affluent gated communities as a means of paying them back for all the grammar rodeos and forensics meets they've attended over the years. This is their opportunity to finally realize that goal."
Despite the potential rewards, however, Croley feels that most early departures are poorly thought out. "I've had students come to me whose only qualifications were remembering the phrases: 'I object,' and 'That's my Lexus,' asking if they should make the jump," he said. "I tell them that no matter what the circumstances, leaving early is dangerous. What if 'the law thing' doesn't work out? They won't have a college degree to fall back on. If anything they should attend more school and become what I like to call 'well rounded.' Even a simple Ph.D. will open so many doors throughout their lives. It's sad to see retired or unsuccessful attorneys reduced to network correspondence during every trial of the century of the month."
Despite the risks, Rubinwicz plans to forge ahead. "I know I'm ready," he said. "I've prepared for this all my life. Growing up, I was always known as the neighborhood's 'surly kid,' and I was voted most argumentative in high school. I've even taken up Tae Bo in case things get a little crazy and words aren't enough to plead my case. Trust me, I'll do fine."
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