Bill Cosby Teaches Black Community A Lesson With Monopoly Money

CLEVELAND, OH�In a recent speech sponsored by the NAACP, beloved TV dad Bill Cosby sparked controversy yet again with remarks concerning the progress of African-Americans. In front of a black audience, Cosby preached the importance of financial responsibility, using Monopoly money to demonstrate successful fiscal management.

�You see, if you got five-hundred dollars, and you have to pay the rent and the bills and such, it doesn�t leave much for luxury items,� said Cosby, pursing his lips and wobbling his head back and forth like your Great-Aunt Magda when she hasn�t taken her meds. �Luckily, Jell-O makes a pudding snack that is affordable to the black community.�

In the 1960s, Cosby crossed racial boundaries on the TV show �I Spy� by being the first black actor to portray a tennis pro. Most recently, though, the Cos has been upsetting many African-American rights leaders because of his rough language when chastising the black community. Even the Rev. Jesse Jackson hasn�t escaped Cosby�s criticism. �The man actually compared me to Alvin, Cliff Huxtable�s ne�er do-well son-in-law,� said Jackson. �It doesn�t get any lower than that. Scat. Bibbity-bat. Cat in the Hat.�

The reaction to Cosby�s comments has been equally critical. �Why should I listen to what this guy has to say about career management?� said one audience member. �There�s been, like, twenty shows with the name �Cosby� in the title, and only one of them was successful. Remember �The Cosby Mysteries?� The only mystery there was who sold their soul to the devil to get that piece of shit on air.�

One of the issues that Cosby often touched on was the lack of positive figures for minority youths to look up to. �What kind of role models do these kids have?� he said. �They got rappers who have lots of the sex and do lots of the drugs. Not like the jazz musicians I looked up to.�

�We need more positive representations of black life on TV and in films,� stressed Cosby. �Which is why everyone should go see Fat Albert: The Movie, about a grossly overweight child and his poverty-stricken friends with speech impediments.�

The final subject Cosby tackled was literacy, an issue near and dear to him. �The kids, they got book bags with no books in them,� said Cosby. �Meanwhile, copies of Fatherhood are still sitting on bookstore shelves. It�s just not right.�

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