UGLi – Although the Askwith Media Library has an unparalleled collection of modern, classical, and German expressionist films, it has been often criticized for the lack of an adequate erotica collection. In response to such criticism, the Shapiro Undergraduate Library has announced the opening of the Kevin Mason Archer Smut Film Collection. The collection, which will debut in late November, boasts over 1,400 classical porno films with new additions added weekly. Additionally, the collection will contain a diverse set of media, such as 35mm films, VHS, DVD, Blu-ray, and even 3D videos.
Kevin Archer, for whom the addition is named, was the primary donor for the collection, supplying 90% of its videos. “I’ve got a lot of porn,” said Archer. “I decided it was selfish of me to hoard it all for myself. Now students throughout the University will finally have first-class access to free porn."



CAMPUS—Despite the Board of Regents’ recent unanimous approval of Eternal Lord and Son of God, Jesus Christ as Spring Commencement speaker, thousands of seniors remain frustrated at the University’s inability to lock-in a legitimate figure for their graduation ceremony.
NHL HEADQUARTERS - In its most recent attempt to boost viewership through the exploitation of physical punishment, the NHL unveiled on Monday its state-of-the-art death-penalty box which will be installed in all thirty arenas by the end of the season.